“Because I’m feeling some kind of shake without you / Uh huh I think you’re moving in too close / but I think that it’s my body wanting it the most like / uh huh I don’t kow what it is I feel / but I know it’s my emotions going in for the kill like uh huh.”
“Uh huh” by Julia Michaels
August 8, 2017
So I endured the first two days of school last week. It was good. I saw my friends but all the people were so overwhelming. I forgot my pop socket, so I had a hard time on the first day. I was fidgeting a lot, and so I flipped my hair without even realizing it, but I needed something to distract me.
I know everything is going to be okay, but it’s hard not to be anxious when every teacher is trying their very best to intimidate. But that’s fine because I live by the fake it till you make it quote and that’s what gives me confidence. Most of my teachers seem cool, but I’m playing two sports, and showing five species of animals at 3 different county fairs. I’m also taking all advanced classes, so it’s just a lot to think about but I can handle it.
Finally lunch came. I was still pretty anxious. Victor (my best friend since 2nd grade) hugged me for like a minute straight. I’m not always a huge fan of physical contact, especially at school when my guard is completely up and I don’t talk but that hug made all the stress go away.
Guitar was okay, but being in the band room with Mrs. Cassidy as my teacher always makes me feel so much better.
The day went on, I made it through, then I had my cross practice. Cross Country is great it’s such a small team, and a love hate relationship with running and feeling all that pain binds you together. So I always feel a lot better, when I run I’m in so much pain but I always feel so much better at the end.
This weekend I went over to my Fair Bestfriend’s house. She’s going to college. It was amazing to spend so much time with her. I just was present with her it felt amazing. I love her so much, and I’m so proud of her and I can’t wait to see her chase her dreams.
Remember, if your dreams don’t scare you, they’re not big enough. Also remember life can be very crazy and it can make you very anxious so maybe just step back, but don’t miss out on everything life has to offer just because you’re scared.
So I guess I’ll catch you on the flip side.
“When you think Tim McGraw, I hope you think of me.”
-Taylor Swift “Tim McGraw”
Back to school edition!
Wow back to school season… I don’t want to go. But, I start on Thursday. Yep, I’m a Sophmore now (in case you were wondering). I don’t know what I feel going into this year. I’m on the cross country team, I’m a huge member of the FFA, I have great friends, and I’m making some more and it’s not making me anxious. I’m looking forward to the dances, the cross races, the football games and the nights with my friends making me feel happy and alive. I aso may be taking some really hard advanced classes but I am taking guitar so I can finally be a part of the band family.
But at the same time, when I walked into the library to pick up my books before school I saw all the people I’ve known since pre school. It’s just weird because I felt this overwhelming feeling of being confined and being left out. Small town problem I guess. I’m also starting to get anxious a lot more in social situations and instead of having panic attacks, or other things, I have a mental breakdown and my body starts to shake and then I breakdown and cry, and I don’t cry.
But let’s be honest here, I shouldn’t be getting anxious. I finally have a great group of friends and I don’t have to go through some of the things I did last year. But the fear of the unknown is always a hard thing I guess. I’m taking almost all advanced classes, and I still don’t know anyone who’s taking them with me.
School can be a drag, but it doesn’t have to be a living hell. You should always look on the bright side. Sorry about my rant, but I figured someone else out there would feel better because of it.
In the end , school is probably going to be great and I have nothing to worry about, but yet I still worry. :p
In the end I’m going to go to school, and I could either drag myself through the entire experience, or I could choose to enjoy the entire experience and face it head on. And I chose to face anything head on that’s why this year is going to be my year.
So I’ll catch you on the flip side!
I changed my theme on my blog, and I will be adding some portfolio pictures as I have gotten into my photography more. Remember that if you find me tolerable, like and follow for morethe button is down bellow.
“Never say it’s low key, you must start somewhere”
Website: maic-fineart.com Facebook.com/maicfineart
Today is the 15th annual celebration of the day I was born. In all honestly I don’t like celebrating my birthday. I don’t know why. I don’t like doing huge things or being celebrated in that way but I appreciate it when I wake up to all my friends on snapchat saying Happy Birthday. So yeah. I don’t know what to say. Last year was the year that I learned who I was and all about myself, and as I get older I will continue to grow and evolve with an open mind.
“Stay classy, sassy, and a little bad assy”
-One of my life quotes
Hello people of the internet! It’s Issie. Right now I’m currently in San Diego. I’m spending some time with family. I come here every summer before I go back to school to visit my family. It’s funny, because it kind of mentally prepares me and relaxes me before school starts.
I have been dreaming of coming here this summer and training for cross country, and it’s so nice to go for a run in the morning and to not have to get up at 5:30am to go run to beat the heat where I live.
So today is San Diego day 2.
Day one recap:
I boarded the plane around 4
Honestly, I am so blessed, because I got to sit by myself! Although their was this nice elderly woman named Carmen who seemed like she didn’t fly much. She sat across that tiny ile way that I can barely fit through, yeah, that one on the plane. She too, also sat alone. During the entire flight we would awkwardly make eye contact and make faces to each other, because we couldn’t hear each other from so far away. She was such a nice lady.
These mountains are a good sign the flight is almost over. Because the ocean is right over that horizon.
Dinner and a show. A European cookie, and water. Oh, and if you realize that that movie is Disney’s The Sword and the Stone, you are the MVP’s.
The airport happens to be right near the Harbor, so that’s where I happened to go to first.
The harbor is normally filled with life, with people selling their trinkets and music pouring all over the place, but this was not the case this time. Although I did find some cool things.
One of them being this epic band of teenagers! They played at a cafe, they were so good and professional, and they sang all original songs.
Woke up, and I didn’t have to force myself to get out of bed to run!
It was a peaceful morning drinking my water listening to the Crisp Leaves & Lattes playlist on spotify by Kalyn Nicholson, on of my favorite YouTubers. It’s a playlist with a bunch of indie music, which sometimes I like to listen to just for the peaceful vibes. Then I got ready and got to go run by the bay. (My dream for about a half a year now was to train running on the bay/beach).
It was an overcast morning, but then the sun broke through, so I got ready to go exploring at Balboa Park.
The science museum was packed so then I ended up going exploring/photoshoot.
Then I met and sang along with this man. He’s a cover artist working on his own stuff. He’s very talented with his guitar, and I bought his cover album he recorded himself. Also he has two dogs, so gotta support that. He has an absolutely beautiful voice and amazing talent.
That’s him and his name, go find him!
I must say, Balboa park is flowing with culture, amazing people and music flowing from every corner. As well as beautiful floriculture and more.
Today was quite an adventure. I can’t wait for what else is going to happen.
I’ll talk to you guys on Monday, until then, I’ll catch you on the flip side.
“Pain is temporary”
July 17, 2017
What is up people of the internet?! It’s Issie, how are you? I hope you’re having a wonderful life. So I am on county fair 3/3. I am honestly so glad to finally be done. I showed dairy goats and breeding goats this time around. I won first in my breeding class, and I won supreme champion registered goat as well. Pretty good for my first time every showing dairy goats.
It was such a long week by the end of it, but it meant the world to me that I got to see my fair best friend.
I also may have cut myself with my pocket knife. I would not stop bleeding, I had to go to the local ER. Surprisingly I didn’t get stitches, I just got it glued together. I felt absolutely no pain during the entire process, and I went back to working the very next day. But I gotta say, it’s hard to type and text with one thumb.
I got to spend a great night with my my girl, and I got to help all of my friends show. I also got to see lots of great older friends of mine that I only get to see once a year. It was some pretty great times, and I can’t wait to go once again with my best friend Andrea.
Oh, and lot’s of the pictures I put in placed very well, and one of my pictures won best of show!
This fair can sometimes be a bunch of overwhelming drama, but this was an amazing fair.
On Thursday I’m off to San Diego, by the time you read this I’m already there.
So that’s my life right now. Thanks again for your support and love on my blog and my posts. Magazine writing and photography is what I hope to do for a living, and this blog is a really strong passion of mine. So like, comment, and subscribe, and I’ll catch you on the flip side.