Manifesting Lions

Can you believe I’m two weeks away from being halfway through high school and two years away from the rest of my life? It’s kind of mind-blowing. Not saying that I wasn’t ever living before, but when you’re growing up you’re ever growing and expanding. You’re learning lessons from your parents and figuring things out for yourself the hard way. We never stop learning, but it’s when we go out on our own that’s when we really start to live. My dad told me this once, “Isabel right now you are just existing.” Sometimes it really feels like it, but other times with the people I love I have never felt more alive.

I’m feeling a bunch of different ways about that, but I can’t stop dreaming about summer. All the things I’m going to do, and the adventures and the nights that are never going to end. Sure, Jr year is going to be crazy busy and riddled with testing but it seems like lately, I’ve been dreaming about the future. But even better I’m excited about these two weeks with my best friends last days of being a sophomore.

My guitar concert is coming up in a week. Our amount of songs that we were playing got cut down but I auditioned to play “Humble and Kind” by Tim McGraw with the choir, and I got it.

There are so many things I’ve got to do but I’m manifesting happiness and lion inside of me.

In my English class, we have been doing a unit on happiness and the manifestation of it, and how to bring it into your life.

All the Ted talk speakers agree that gratitude is happiness and I completely agree. When you are grateful for what and who is around you, you can enjoy it and be happy. They also say being vulnerable brings happiness too. I think I can agree. My happiest moments are when I am with my best friends, and when I am with them my guard is completely down. I think when you can let your guard down and be vulnerable you can enjoy those happy moments to the core.

The past two weeks that I have been at fair, and working really hard to get my grades in order. I aced my algebra test. I feel very burnt out, and I’m trying to take as many hours as I can to rest. Through all the chaos the last two weeks I have stayed happy and have not panicked once. I feel healthy emotionally and mentally, but for the first time in a long time, I recognize the need to take care of myself. It’s almost a proud feeling. Self-care was one of my goals this year and the conquering of my anxiety, and I’m doing just that.

So go out there and achieve greatness, and manifest the lions in your life that can conquer anything.

-Issie

Also, expect big changes this summer.

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Lion at Heart

Hey. This post is more of an update on how I’m doing and where I’m at, so if you’re interested, then keep on reading.

So, starting. My boyfriend and I broke up. We both wanted to break up, so it was extremely mutual, but I am a little sad because it killed our amazing friendship. We were only together for two months. This is the first time I’ve been single in maybe over a half a year. I’ve been thinking about my first relationship a lot recently, my 5-month relationship that ended back in January. I don’t want to go back to it, I believe it ended for a reason, but I have been thinking about how good it was, and how I want that, someone like that again. Definitely not for a while, but at least it helps me once again recognize what I want. I believe that after any relationship you should try and find a lesson in it. I have no doubt in my mind that I am going to find something better than what I had before, but the lesson is always something to remember to think about.

I’ve also been studying like crazy. Homework is non stop, and I’m trying to get my driver’s permit. I have one week and a half until my test and I am completely and totally nervous. Not to mention having an unbelievably horrible amount of homework because the hustle never stops.

Speaking of stuff coming up in two weeks, Merced County Spring Fair is in two weeks, and I am working with my animals every day. When push comes to shove, I always remember I can sleep when I’m dead.

But it sounds like I’m complaining about all I’m doing, and we don’t need that negative energy. Today I played guitar for the second time with my church band, and I took my new acoustic-electric guitar (Jessie) out for a spin. I was great. I love music, it’s such a huge part of my life. I always tell people my playlist says what I can’t, and all my walls are down when I am listening to music and that is when I am truly myself. Since we’re on the subject of music, my high school’s spring concert is coming up. Where the band, choir, and guitar will be playing. The setlist for guitar includes:

  1. “Another One Bites the Dust” Queen
  2. “Heart Shaped Box” Nirvana
  3. “Elanor Rigby” Beatles
  4. “Stand By Me” King
  5. “Peter Gun” Mancini

Now, that sounds like fun. It’s even more fun playing it.

I don’t even want to think about finals, but if that is what stands in the way of my summer I am all for it, but that’s a month away.

Anxiety-wise, I haven’t had a single panic attack since my ex-entered my life. He was a really good friend for a while. I was lucky to have him in my life while I did. Sometimes I shake, but I feel healthier and better, and it seems like my body and my mind are handling situations that normally ended in wasting time panicking, in a good and healthy way. I also honestly think I am taking care of myself better. Even though I will always put work and especially my friends over myself.

I have a new plant family. I love watching them right by my window, and they’re succulents so I don’t have to take care of them 24/7. They say having live things around you makes you feel more alive, and it does.

Ooh, and I don’t know if I mentioned this before, but I got M.V.P for soccer. That meant so much to me. I was the team captain and then M.V.P. My coach didn’t even show, only the assistant one. That says a lot about the season. He didn’t say much about anybody, but he did say that he believed that I would do great things and become a great leader, and that meant everything to me. I have a lot to live up to next year if I want to be varsity goalie, but I will work hard every day because I have to if I want to prove myself and gain respect.

I guess this is a good way to lead into why this is titled ‘Lion at Heart’. The breakup wasn’t that bad, but as I mentioned it kind of sucked, but it felt like I was my lion self again. I never changed myself, but I was sad for awhile that’s why the breakup occurred, but something changed. I feel free again. It’s like a part of me, the lion badass part of me turned on again. I am working non-stop, and I can handle it, and I feel ready to take on and conquer this week to come. I have been looking at my phone a lot. The Quote Wednesday #33 is my phone lock screen to remind me.

There’s a fire inside me, and it’s back and I can do anything. So can you if you really want to. I have a new lion logo in the works hopefully to be up by the new may changes. Follow to be a part of the pride, and give this a like down bellow too.

Have a good week and a good life.

-Issie

 

 

I am a Lion

Hello, people of the internet. Today’s post is going to be a weird one, but try and keep up with me. I hope you guys are doing well, and are having a good week and a good life. But I’m going to jump into it.

This is something I haven’t told too many people, I think just my boyfriend my mom. I always thought this was so weird, but I think I would love to bring this into my life more. I feel spiritually connected to my core to a lion. I don’t know where this started but I do. I was born in July, and I am a Leo, but I feel like the connection goes further than my zodiac.

“The lion is one of the most widley recognised animal symbols in human culture.”

-Wikipedia

When I hear or see a lion my first thoughts are about how the lion is considered the “king of the jungle”. They are a sign of leadership, strength, and courage. Ancient Egyptians even worshiped them for their strength and fierceness. So in my mind, I have always looked up to the lion for the symbol it is.

The character of a lion does also say a lot about my deep connection with it. They are some of the only animals that live in groups called Prides. They are also the only animals that attack with females, and are very strategic and intelligent as well as lazy and sleep a lot.

Taking the lion description do another perspective. I mentioned at the beginning that I am a Leo, and the traits of that zodiac almost completely relate to me. (Disclaimer: I don’t take zodiacs to heart, but there’s a certain amount of connection I feel to them).

So the Leo zodiac is based on a lion, our planet is the sun (makes sense), and our element is fire. Leos are very confident, headstrong/stubborn, strong, loyal, fiery, fearless/adventurous, etc. My personality and life actually accurately relate to the traits of a Leo, even the faults are similar to mine.

I didn’t connect the dots on this connection until last year. As a person, I find that I am a very strong person that can stand on her own two feet, but I need my friends and they really are my Pride. Lions are just so strong and majestic, and I think that’s so amazing to look up to something so pure and amazing like a Lion, and I love incorporating the traits of strength and loyalty to make myself a better person. The lion is so badass and bigger than me. Even before I felt this connection I always loved the lion’s breath in yoga and called my crazy curly hair my ‘Lion’s Mane’. Because in my mind heart and soul not only am I connected to a lion, but some part of me is a lion.

I am also going to be making a logo soon that might have some lion incorporated into it. Always work to make yourself better, and like and follow more down below, and hustle harder every day.

Love,

-Issie

Out of Hybernation

There is finally a break from all the rain! Sunshine is here and in a pleasant amount! (Generally, in the Central Valley of California it’s either one extreme of wet and cold to the other of triple number degree temperatures.) I have been waiting for spring to finally, well, spring up from the earth. I always find when the temperature gets cold I always find reasons to have the blues, even if it is from external forces that are out of my control. Spring means school is almost over, I can wear flip flops and run more. Even better it means that summer is almost here! But I am not mentally or physically prepared for heatwaves that feel like they last from infinity.

As March is winding to an and it felt like it wasn’t quite my month. I was very busy with school, and I ignored the things that I want to manifest into my life or some things I should do to take care of myself. Not a single panic attack and I never stopped hustling.

Some of the biggest things I’ve wanted to manifest into my life include:

  • New blog logo- I want to create a logo that goes at the top of my website for the tab and a logo that represents me and I can put on everything.
  • Lions- Follow up post on the reasoning for Lions next week, follow to hear about it when it goes up.
  • Plants- It’s spring! I want more plants, and I want to work hard not to kill them.
  • Better outfits- Because California has been in a drought since I was a baby child my wardrobe is mainly equipped with warmer climates. Despite how much I love my sweater that I wear every single day of my life, I want to change things up now that it’s warmer to boost my confidence a bit.
  • My driver’s test!- I forgot to study a lot this month for it.
  • Acoustic electric guitar- I’ve wanted one for a half a year now and my playing has gotten much better.

Since we’re talking about playing guitar. I’ve been playing for three years. I am a pretty solid rhythm guitarist. I want to get better at playing lead electric guitar solos and improvising. But now, I am playing acoustic guitar at my church every month. I play three songs and strictly rhythm. I can sing, but I can’t carry a tune in a bucket in the keys that the church plays in (G and B).

I have three guitars now, two electric and one acoustic. My electric’s name is Jay Fender, he is a Fender Stratocaster, the new electric guitar was given to me by my boyfriend that plays blacksaphone and got this guitar when he was a kid. He no desires to learn guitar so this is the newest member of our family. His name is Tiny Tim, being that he is a Stratocaster Mini. Finally, my very first guitar is a red acoustic Jhonson guitar, his name is Martin. I can’t use Martin on stage because he’s not electric, and he’s getting too small being that I got him 5 years ago when I was small.

This month for me has been an amazing transition from all the problems I was having to kicking ass. If you would like to hear me play guitar, or just hear more about guitar let me know in the comments. As I am coming out of hibernation I will continue to learn and make myself better, as well as take care of myself and do some things to make myself happy. I hope you all will do the same and continue to grow into some amazing human beings.

-Issie

 

How to Survive High School: How to Be a Badass

Hello people of the internet! How are you doing? I am doing quite well. I’ve mentioned before, that the last two months have been really hard on me because of break-ups, moving on, and panic attacks for unknown reasons every week. I was not in the best place. Although I feel much better now, but for awhile I felt very stuck. It was like no matter how tired I would never be consistently happy. I needed a change and I knew it. I think the thing that helped me the most from escaping that dark void of anxiety and constant panic attacks was taking time for myself. I was so caught up, and I never had time for myself, and I am happy, and even in the face of adversity and stress I managed to handle it like a badass, and that’s what I’m here to help you with.

I have mentioned the term of badass in previous posts before. I have given that term a certain amount of power in my mind. When I hear that word I think of some really amazing person. Someone who has amazing stories and adventures, they don’t take no for an answer, and they most certainly don’t take any shit. And their confidence follows them anywhere, and everywhere they go. That’s the person I try to be, and I know for a fact I am the best version of myself when I am confident, and being a badass helps me conquer the world. So here’s my tips to you

 

How to Survive High School: How to be a Badass

 

1.Cut the negative out of your life- You are who you hang out around. I speak from experience by saying it may be hard, but if you are consistently around bad people or people that put you down in high school you will never get up to your full potential.

  1. Believe you are- I’ll do a post on the law of attraction, but if you believe you are a confident badass then you are. Even if you’re getting anxious even if kids are giving you crap just be yourself. Believe that yourself is the most badass person out there. Because you are.
  2. Don’t be insecure- You are blessed. I mean, you’re able to read this, your life must not be all that bad. Don’t be insecure about your life, or any part of your body. I tend to be insecure about my acne, but then I remind myself I’m beautiful. I rock my acne. That’s what badass people do they own their insecurities, and when they do they bring that sort of presence that makes you want to be around them.
  3. Don’t give a crap about the other people- When you’re a badass you’re above anybody else’s idiotic comments, because you are secure in yourself, and you should be.
  4. Fake it till you make it- I was always told this by my band director. You may not completely feel confident, but if you fake it, you will eventually make it. That’s why they say if you’re sad you should smile because even though you’re faking the smile it releases endorphins that make you happy, it’s basically the same thing with your confidence. It gets hard sometimes in the face of adversity, but it helps you feel like you can stand on your own two feet.

 

It’s not just about faking confidence to not get crap from either, it’s about accepting and loving yourself, and not caring about what others think because you are yourself, and that’s all that matters. That sounds like a great way to go through life to me.

So I hope you guys remember to love yourself, and take time for yourself. Hustle hard, and go out every day and be a badass.

 

-Issie

 

Rainy Day List

Hello, people of the internet! How are you guys? I hope you’re doing great. I know I am, but I’m also a little cold. But for a girl who lives in the valley of Californa where there has been a drought for almost 5 years its freaking cold outside! But I mean at least it’s raining. Hence this post. So this is my go-to list of things to do on a good rainy day.

  1. Be Productive- Take time to do tasks inside. Clean your house, do some computer work, be productive. Get the little inside tasks that you normally push aside done, and do it at your pace. It’s raining, so its a chill day.
  2. Take a mental health day- Now that your work is done take a mental health day. Spend some time by yourself, take care of yourself, and your body. Do things that make you happy.
  3. Try something new- There’s only so much you can do while inside, but with the internet, we have the world at our fingertips. Learn something new, read a new book, write, do something that you’ve always wanted to do before. Listen to music, have a dance party, try yoga, just love your life.
  4. Watch movies!- Movies are my favorite thing in the world on a rainy day. I will cover Netflix and Amazon Prime for a good movie.
  5. Build a fort- Going with the movie theme, build a fort, make it comfy and cozy. Add tons of blankets and pillows, candles, twinkle lights, and make it a safe place. Let out your inner child.
  6. Make food- Food makes the body and the soul happy. Don’t go out and get food make food from what you already have at home and just have a good time.
  7. Hang out with friends- It’s good to take time for yourself, but we are always better when we are with other people. Take time with the people you care about most, and just relax in comfy clothes and have a good time.

Just yesterday my friends and I got together to play board games, and watch old movies, and play truth or dare. It was a super chill night, we took tons of polaroids and it felt great to just be together.

So if you have a rainy day, try one of these things. Because every day is a possibility even the rainy ones. Have an amazing week, and an amazing week. Follow and like for more where we hustle harder every day.

-Issie

Panic Attack Aftermath Care List

So I had two panic attacks this week. One was out of the blue, and the other was for a very minor reason. I am okay, but it was just intense and I keep on dwelling on it, and I felt very shaken up about it. I feel a lot better, but I’ve been busy, although I know I need to take care of myself, I don’t have time to take a night for myself. So I’m trying to incorporate little things that I love to go into my busy schedule to help me. I mean, I’m writing this blog post, and writing always helps. So I am giving you my list of things I like to do to pick myself up after a hard panic attack. If you’ve ever been through one. They come out of nowhere, they shake you up, and they are emotionally and physically draining. Sometimes it’s also hard to get on with your day after.

  1. Meditate- Meditation is the best thing of life let me tell you. Meditation can come in so many ways. It can be in the form or writing, singing, praying, reading, or just straight up sitting in a cross-legged position on a yoga mat going full-on boho. I like to meditate outside barefoot on my yoga mat. Granted sometimes I meditate in different ways, but I love sitting there on my mat, feeling the grass in between my toes at the edge of it. Breathing in all of the sents around me and just taking it all in. I think I pray, sometimes I even shut down for a full 30 minutes. This is one of the most helpful things after a panic attack because most of all its a brief time to breathe in and breathe out, and that is one of the most important things to do right after. Considering you generally hyperventilate beforehand.
  2. Replenish yourself- Panic attacks are mentally and physically draining, so please, eat some food, and drink some water.
  3. Talk to someone!- Talking to someone even if they don’t deal with stuff like this is better than keeping it in. In fact, it just causes you too well up your emotions and you risk the chance of a mental breakdown. And man we’re trying to get that negative energy out of here!
  4. Repeat mantras or affirmations- Speaking of positive vibes only, when you panic, often after you feel so overwhelmed like a negative cloud is still over you even after, but you can’t let it ruin your whole day, or your life for that matter. So whisper positive afirmations under your breath. Don’t be hard on yourself. You already went through enough physically.
  5. Take the night off- Take the night off, put yourself back together. Do your favorite stuff. Dress yourself up, get comfy, listen to music etc.
    1. Build a fort- Build a fort somewhere in your house make it comfy. Put lots of blankets in it, and lots of pillows. Get your computer, and some candles. Being in a fort also makes you feel more like a kid, and you can lay low and relax.
    2. Watch movies- Movies are the best I love watching Clueless, and School of Rock. I prefer watching comedies, or like 90’s-20’s movies.
    3. Listen to music- Music is the way the soul speaks when words don’t work so well and my friends are good listeners, but they have horrible advice but I know they’re always there for me but they’re boys and they’re bad at giving advice. So music helps a lot. My Spotify playlists (Running and Thinking, and Problematic help a lot) ispat1000
  6. Take care of yourself- Drink water, eat food, be nice to yourself.

This isn’t something to be ashamed of or to get mad of yourself about, this is something to accept as a part of you, but always work to minimize it’s affect on your life. Because you can always have a bad day, but in the end, it is our choice to have a bad life. I love you all. Like and follow for more.

-Issie

An Ode to Being Alone

This is an ode to being alone. This is a story about a girl who loves to sit by herself. Why don’t people like this anymore? People rush around latching to attention, even if it’s from a negative place, but at least they are not alone. But why do they fear it? Do they fear themselves? I did once, I understand, but I also know nobody can put my demons in the corner but me. Every now and then they crawl back, but sometimes you need your demons to help you recognize when you need to let go of another darkness that has gradually put itself into your life.

People also have a fear of the dark. Especially when alone. The dark is nothing but another perspective of the day. Just because you don’t understand it doesn’t mean we should fear it.

Maybe that’s why people don’t like to be alone, we have a fear that we might get killed, or kidnapped by ourselves, but maybe it’s the sub-conscience thinking that they fear because they don’t understand themselves.

Humans are a weird amazing species. If you sit down alone for a second and just watch other people. That’s what I’m doing. I have friends, by reading this, you probably think I don’t, I do. I love being with them, or around them, but they know me so well they know when I want to be alone it’s just because I’m in the mood for hanging with myself because internally I’m a pretty dope person. But they also know when to not leave me alone. When my boyfriend breaks up with me, or I have family issues, or I’m stressed, or anxious about anything they know not to leave me alone because it’s hard for me to open up to people or ask them for help if I need it. But I don’t have to say a word, they know.

As much as we hate being alone, sometimes we shouldn’t. To any unspoken rule that humanity creates, there’s always a contrary situation. I love being alone, but I need my friends. That though, is what makes me human.

I raise goats (I know, that’s a huge twist in the conversation). But I can spend $300 dollars on a goat to raise to take to market. But he isn’t worth anything if he doesn’t have a friend. Goats are social animals, and if they don’t have a friend they are less likely to gain as much as they should, because they’re lonely.

That’s us. Well, makes sense, God says we’re like sheep. Sheep are stupid, so are we. We get amazingly lonely because we don’t love ourselves, and we fill lost without our shepherd, but we replace our shepherd with invalid things in our lives.

So far, we subconsciously fear ourselves and hate ourselves. Most people do. That’s another reason why we don’t like being alone, we tell ourselves we aren’t and don’t look good enough so we, therefore, seek validation through other people.

When I ran cross country I went down two shirt sizes and one pant size. But I loved myself before I started running and changed my body. God and your Mama are proud of what they gave you, why can’t we accept it. Frankly, I love myself on the outside, and on the inside. And my personality has lots of rough edges, but nobody can understand me and love me as well as God and myself does. That’s why I love spending so much time alone. Yes, I may have some problems, and panic attacks from time to time, but at least because I love myself I can tell myself what to get better on.

This is an ode to being alone, because you, and I are really cool humans. When you spend time with yourself, you realize how awesome you, the things around you, and the people around you are. This is an ode to being alone, and all it has to offer. But it’s offerings come from us, so isn’t it really an ode to me?

Comment below what you think! Like and follow for more. Have a great week and a great life.

-Issie

M A N I A

Hey peoples. I decided to actually do a post for Friday. Monday was a bit downing, but I feel a lot better now. I hope anyone who was feeling crappy then too is feeling better.

But today we have something better, and more important to talk about. Fall Out Boy released a new album! M A N I A! I swear this album might have made purple my color for 2018. It’s so good. To most people F.O.B. is a very bazar taste. They’re a very unique sound with some strange lyrics that make sense at the same time. The fans understand. I love the new album. Let me tell you about my top songs on the album and why.

I’m not going to review all the songs, but I’m going to first put them in order in which I like them.

  1. “Heaven’s Gate”
  2. “Wilson (Expensive mistakes)”
  3. “Church”
  4. “HOLD ME TIGHT OR DON’T”
  5. “Champion”
  6. “Young and Menace”
  7. “Sunshine Riptide”
  8. “Bishops Knife Trick”
  9. “Stay Frosty Royal Milk Tea”

This album is close to the same length of songs as American Psycho. Their last album (11 songs) which is pretty good, because it takes a lot to make an album, especially these F.O.B. albums with so much fire.

“Heaven’s Gate”- Let’s talk about this song. It is so beautiful. The words are so beautiful. Some of the lyrics are once again bazar but make perfect sense. I love Patrick’s vocals in the chorus, it’s a little raspy, but sometimes they sing like they’re a heavy metal band not pop, but that’s just how diverse their sound is. It’s 5 chords, making it more interesting than a basic 4 chord song.

The song talks about maybe not making it to heaven, and having a friend boost you over the gate, and how you want to be with your significant other forever.

“HOLD ME TIGHT OR DON’T”- I’d rather talk about this song more than the two above it just because the other two I love and have a meaningful impact on me, but this song, but this song is just so cool.

The music video for this song was shot trying to represent Dia de los Muertos 2016. I think this beat I just don’t know how to describe it it’s so cool!. It just makes you want to get up and dance and move your ass! It’s so rock, and fun. I am apparently bad with words now… I will be honest the song is a bit autotuned. Especially towards the end bridge. If you listen to him sing this song live on I think it is the Today Show, Patrick’s voice totally cracks. It’s a hard note he’s trying to hit.

“Stay Frosty Royal Milk Tea”- This song I wanted to mention I put last because personally I wasn’t into it, and I couldn’t get into it, and I felt like some of the transitions from verse to bridge to chorus were too clashing for my taste. But this song is still on my playlists, and I like to listen to it before games for a little extra to pump me up.

Fall Out Boy did a great job on this new album, and I feel like they grew a bit but their music is still continuously true to who they are as a band. F.O.B. is definitely not for everyone… but I know I’m addicted. If you want to hear some of their stuff on my personal playlists ispat1000 on Spotify. It’s been awhile since I’ve talked about music, and I am definitely band trash. Comment below if you’d like to hear me do some guitar stuff. If you find me tolerable, like and follow for more.

Rock on people.

-Issie